The Avengers

The Avengers 2012 Poster

“I thought it was crap. The acting was dire and the story was stupid. It reminded me of an average episode of the Power Rangers. I could predict all the jokes before they told them, and not in an “oh, cool, he’s going to say that” way, but in a here-we-go way, and it just wasn’t funny. The bit with the Hulk and Loki was the only point where I cracked a smile. Samuel L Jackson sounded like he turned up, said, “I’ll say the lines but I’m only going to do them once” and Robert Downey Jr just phoned it in. It reminded me of Transformers – I just did not care what happened to anyone. Too many explosions and too much CGI. I was just really bored.”

I’m staring at Him Indoors. Did we just watch the same film?

Because my first thoughts were … Oh, OK. I’ll be honest here: my first thoughts were, “OK, Tom Hiddleston? I wouldn’t kick him out of bed.” This was important because if there was only one thing I knew about The Avengers (AKA Avengers Assemble), it was that every girl on Planet Earth (and, presumably, Asgard if they have Tumblr there) is very loudly and passionately in love with Tom Hiddleston. I wouldn’t go that far, but he’s not completely hideous.

My next thought after that thought was that I just watched a really good film. You already know this. It’s the third highest grossing film of all time with a 92% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. It’s not the most amazing film I’ve ever seen, but I’d rank it comfortably between the Iron Man films and the first two X-Men. I told Him Indoors four-out-of-five, which concurs with its review average of 8/10. (You’ll notice this about me: when I disagree with the critics, they’re all wrong, but when they agree with me, they’re just stating the obvious.) It just does everything right – exhilarating action scenes, witty banter and a plot that doesn’t ramble. Continue reading